Agent Fubar

....hot on the trail of them Ghanaian Scammers!

From: bob white [mailto: bob.white247@gmail.com ]
Sent: Tuesday, February 08, 2011 4:13 PM
Subject: info needed

On 2-8-11, Bob White wrote:
Hi good day,

I will like to know if you carry out pool fence services..

Look forward to you response.

Regards,
Bob
4241 Mcnamara Way
City : Sacramento
95825 ,CA
phone:760-xxx-xxxx

On 2-9-11, Vladdio wrote:
Hi Bob,

Yes we do carry out pool fence services.

Unlike many of our competitors, we go that extra mile to satisfy our customer’s needs. And in your case, we go that extra 3000 miles.

Let me know exactly what you need and I’ll write up a proposal for you.

Thanks.

Simba Witz
Service Manager
Vladdio Pool Fence Service

On 2-10-11, Vladdio wrote:
Hi Bob,

Are you still interested in our service? Please get back to me ASAP.

Thanks.

Simba

On 2-10-11, Bob White wrote:
Yes I am interested and what are the sizes that you can have costume for me..

Bob

On 2-10-11, Vladdio wrote:
Hi Bob,

Regarding your question about sizes….

We carry a full line of sizes from 35” to up and including 87”. We can of course customize each size according to the conditions of the crank and flow.

We’ve found that the 44” and the 53” work well in all positions from flout to grimmel.

Let me recommend that you order 150’ of 44”. The Blue and the Blush colors are the most popular. I’ll need you to make a decision about that as I can’t really recommend one over the other.

The price is $14.95 per foot bringing this to a total of $2,242.50

If you find that the 44” is not to your liking we can exchange it at a small return fee. But truly, I’m fairly certain 44” will work for you.

I will need to know how and where you would like this shipped, what payment terms you prefer, and of course the color.

I look forward to hearing back from you.

Thank you.

Simba.

On 2-10-11, Bob White wrote:
I will like to go in for 44' and hope you can put the charges on my mastercard or visacard.. with the total amount of $2,242.50 and how soon can this order can be ready

Bob

On 2-10-11, Vladdio wrote:
Hi Bob,

The material you asked about is in stock and is normally ready to ship in 24 hours. However we’ve recently discovered that our online catalogue, accessible through our website, has been hacked by Ghanaian scammers. We were forced to shut it all down (our website too) and we are, even now, redoubling our IT branch to cover losses and repair the vandalism.

Fortunately, government techs from the Department of Science knew about this even before we did and they imposed a kind of martial law at our main headquarters as soon as we found out that we were hit. No one comes in and no one goes out. Apparently (and I didn’t know this) besides being the home of the sloppiest people in the world Ghana is also the world’s hub of the internet’s dopiest scammers and biggest losers. These government types have countless stories about Ghana. I don’t think I’ve ever heard so many dirty jokes and clever insults about one group of people in my whole life. For example, here’s a mild one: Question: How many Ghanaians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer: Please don’t say the word “Ghanaian”. It gets me sick to my stomach.

I think you and I should be glad to be from a country like the USA where vomiting is not a spectator sport. It is in Ghana.

Anyway, to answer your question, yes we take MasterCard and VisaCard. Please let me know how you would like to handle shipping.

We expect to be up and running in a few more days. Agent Fubar says they have pretty good intelligence on the idiot Ghanaian scammers and they should have warrants issued for them before the weekend. None of this affects you in any other way, of course, since you’re in California. (I’m in North Carolina.) And I’m sorry to prattle on so, but it’s not everyday I run into Ghanaian scammers. Y’know, I even heard they have tails!

Simba

PS I must know what color you decided on. Blue or Blush? By the way, Rook is also a nice color.

On 2-12-11, Vladdio wrote:
Hi Bob,

Great News! The G-men here wrapped up their investigation late last night and your order is ready to ship.

(I guess the government of Ghana caved to US demands to crack down on these stupid Ghanaians – I heard even their shadows smell funny. They’re sending out animal wranglers to round them up. They used to use cattle prods but it turns out they liked it. Now they just wave bars of soap and deodorant at them. That gets them moving.)

So send me your payment info as soon as you can.

Hey – God Bless America, right? We should thank our lucky stars that we were born this far from an armpit like Ghana.

Simba