...when a wise man would have chosen "Gadorp". (Does that make any sense?)
From: David Kelly [mailto:davidkelly24g@yahoo.com]
Sent: Sunday, October 25, 2009 12:44 PM
Subject: Oder Request
On 10-25-09, David Kelly wrote:
Hello Sir/Madam,This is David Kelly from Lilburn , Georgia USA ,I would like to know if you do carry (Pool Covers)In stock,If you have kindly let me know the sizes,and types so that i will check and purchase the one am interested ..And what are the price ranges so that i would know the quantity to order.I will like to proceed the payment with my credit card details .
And provide you with a shipping company to schedules the pick up with you by picking it from your location to my new dealership in Sweden. Hope to hear from you soon.
Thank you
Best Regards.
Kelly(Owner)
On 10-26-09, Vladdio wrote:
Dear Kelly(Owner),
Your information request has been forwarded to me. I handle all pool cover orders as well as dealer training at our East Coast Facility.
We carry every stock shape and size cover as well as all custom covers. However since you indicate that these covers will be going to a dealership in Sweden, I believe you would probably be interested in the Scandinavian models that we find so popular in Finland, Norway, Iceland, and Denmark.
The common names of these stock covers are Esperanto-like versions of a poly-glot Scandinavian language. People in that part of the world apparently understand the terms:
Rectangles
16 x 32 "Kraken-Fluken" List $1599
18 x 36 "Chraul-nod-Chraul" List $1699
20 x 40 "Gadorp" List $1799
Grecians
16 x 32 "Sklurk" List $1649
18 x 36 "Orken-Flukle" List $1749
20 x 40 "Ok-bagok" List $1849
Discounts off of List Price
Quantities
1 to 5 ----- 40%
6 to 10 ----- 40% + 10%
11 to 25 ----- 40% + 10% + 5%
26 to 40 ----- 40% + 10% + 10%
41 to 65 ----- 40% + 10% + 10% + 5%
66 to 100 ----- 40 % + 10% + 10% + 10%
101 to 1,000,000 ----- 40% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10%
1,000,001 to 100,000,000 ----- 40% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% + 10% +5%
As you can see, if you were going to buy 1,000,000 covers, you'd be better off buying 1,000,001 since you get a much better discount there.
Thank you for your interest.
Please let me know how you would like to proceed.
Cameron Asgaboom
(My friends call me "Boom Boom". You may also)
On 10-26-09, David Kelly wrote:
Thanks for your reply and am interested in purchasing 3 pieces of them(16 x 32 "Kraken-Fluken)with the price $1599 and i need you to check and gave me the quote on that ...
I will like to proceed the payment with my credit card detailsand it will be shipping to Sweden
So i will provide you with a shipping company to schedules the pick up with you by picking it from your location to my dealership in Sweden and proved me your number so that we can talk on phone you cell OKThanks and hope to hear back from you asap.
Regards,
Kelly........
On 10-26-09, David Kelly wrote:
I need 20 pieces of them Ok ,Not 3 but 20 of them and let me know the total plus shipping did you contact them?
David
On 10-27-09, Vladdio wrote:
Dear David,
Please call me Boom-Boom. All of my friends do.
Thank you for your order of 20 - 16 x 32 "Kraken-Fluken" Covers. I believe it was a wise choice.
I recently read a report on Swedish Swimming Pools in a pamphlet entitled "Getting Your Noodle Wet in Scandinavia" and apparently the 16 x 32 cover size is the hot-hot-hot cover this year!
Also it was a good idea getting 20 instead of 4. The discount is so much better.
20 x $1599 = $31,980.
$31,980 x .6 = $19,188
$19,188 x .9 = $17,269.20
$17,269.20 x .95 = $16,405.74
So your total cost is $16,405.74
You never told me what shipper you wanted to use so I took it upon myself to contact one. They are called Asgaboom Cargo, LTD. And I can personally vouch for them. The total cost for shipping to anywhere in Sweden is $11,450.
How would you be paying for all of this?
Boom-Boom
On 10-27-09, David Kelly wrote:
Hello
I am Very Grateful to receive your mail once more with the Quote but i call one of my business partner and we will be needing four(4)pieces of them first OK and please , As i said the earlier on that , I will like the Products to be shipped to Where its Needed and Thus Sweden to be Precise. I will like you to Please try and Send them a Mail containing the Total Weight , Size and Dimension of the Product and Ask them for the Pick up and the Shipping Quote from the Pick up Location to where the Product is Needed Above
To the below destination :
Shipping To Address :--
R & B Ventures Co.Ltd
Matslingan 17,Arninge
72223,Sweden
I have Already Talked to them on this Pick up and Shipping Arrangement and i will be much Glad if you send them the Information required and Ask them for the Pick up and the Shipping Quote back for me to proceed to Paying for the Total Cost of the Whole Purchase Plus Pick up and Shipping Quote . Shipping and Pick Up Company's Information Below,
Name of Shipping Company: ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD
Shipping Company Contact Name :-ROBERT TAWIAH
Shipping Contact E-mail Address: ROBERSONEASYWAY.UK@HOTMAIL.COM
Do hope to hear back from you with the Estimated Quote from the Shipping company plus the Product Cost for me to proceed to Paying my Order with My Valid Credit Card Numbers .I will be happy if you will proved me your cell number so that we can talk more on phone....
David Kelly
On 10-27-09, Vladdio wrote:
Dearest David,
I'm not sure why you have chosen to disrespect me by not addressing me as a friend and calling me "Boom-Boom". I have been as eloquent and respectful of you in all cases and I have always addressed you as David. Around the world, all of my friends, associates, business contacts, organized crime figures, and animal trainers have shown me the respect even total strangers should afford to one another. Yet you have not.
I have even inconvenienced myself by making an effort to find you a shipper when I thought you had neglected to do so. (And believe me, finding a shipper to take pool covers to Sweden is not that easy.)
The total for your order now stands at $16,405.74 for 20 pieces. Now you tell me that you only need 4. I cannot give you the same discount that applies to 20 pieces since you suggest that you would not be paying for the total package all at once.
If you had shown me the proper respect by addressing me as "Boom-Boom" I might have allowed the full discount for this short order.
This is your very last chance.
I have written this haiku to express my feelings about this:
Four out of twenty,
And you don't call me "Boom-Boom".
Where is my respect?
Boom-Boom
On 10-27-09, David Kelly wrote:
Dearest Boom-Boom, How are you dong i hope all is all with you, I need the 4 and i will order the rest later OK am so sorry about that so contact them and let me know the total cost plus my order and the shipping cost from ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD..
David
On 10-28-09, Vladdio wrote:
Thank you so much, David Kelly!
...not for the reduction in the size of the order (that sucks and I am both angry and very disappointed in it).
No, thank you for showing the respect to consider me a friend (even though true friends wouldn't reduce the size of their order with me by 80%! That really pisses me off.)
Therefore 4 units x $1599 = $6,396.
Your discount for this quantity should only be 40% but I did say I would give you the 20 unit discount which is 40% + 10% + 5% so whereas you should be paying $3,837.60, with the better discount you only pay $3,281.15 - an additional savings to you of $556.45.
(.......now that really burns my ass! First you treat me like shit and then I have to give away almost $600 just to get a little courtesy from you.... you've got a lot of goddamned nerve.)
I will contact the shipping company you wish to use. (I hope they're not a bunch of ignorant assholes like some people I know.)
And I'll let you know the shipping charges as soon as I can. (...like I should go to great lengths to help you....)
Boom-Boom
On 10-28-09, Vladdio wrote to the shipper:
Dear ROBERT TAWIAH,
Please read the correspondence below regarding a shipment of 4 (that's all - only 4!) pool covers that this David Kelly guy ordered from me.
He wants me to find out the costs of shipping. He's too goddamned lazy to do it himself. You know the type. Probably a real wimpy putz; wants everybody to give him some slack; too stupid to figure things out for himself.
Don't get me started.
Anyway....
Let me know the cost so I can pass it on to Little Davy Kelly, the goofball.
Boom-Boom
On 10-28-09, Robert Tawiah (the "shipper") wrote
ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD (Dealers in Shipping,Importing & Exporting of Goods)
Hello Value Customer,
Thank you for your interest in using ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD
We need you location first before we can give you total cost
Mosher Tawiah
Shipping Department.
ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD
On 10-28-09, Vladdio wrote to the shipper:
Dear Mosher (Robert),
Please forgive my oversight in not providing you with the pick-up location. I was so flustered with the behavior of David Kelly that I completely overlooked it. I'm sure you'll understand. Dealing with ignoramuses like him puts a stress on me like a striddy on a chicken (if you know what I mean.)
I don't know how often you are forced to deal with Dipshit Kelly, but I would be careful. They say that stupidity is not contagious but all the same, I'd hedge my bets and play it safe. Keep contact to a minimum. And for god's sake, don't share a smoothie with him.
By the way, if you have met him, maybe you can satisfy my curiosity. Does he wear a pointed hat, pick his nose, and drool? That's how I imagine him.... just wondering...
The pick-up address is as follows:
Clappy Hands Industrial Park
32 Permafrost Circle
Tippytoes, Alaska 99929
Thanks for your help.
Boom-Boom (but you can continue calling me: Value Customer! I like that!)
On 10-28-09, Robert Tawiah wrote:
ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD
(Dealers in Shipping,Importing & Exporting of Goods)
Hello Boom-boom,
Thank you for your interest in using ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD for your shipping needs.We checked on shipping (4 pool covers)from your location which is thus:
Pick Up Address:
Clappy Hands Industrial Park
32 Permafrost Circle
Tippytoes, Alaska 99929
To the below destination :
Shipping To Address :--
R & B Ventures Co.Ltd
Matslingan 17,Arninge
72223,Sweden
and its going to cost $1,775.00.That includes international airway taxes (I.A.T), Tariffs and custom's clearance duties.Product is very secured in our custody and well protected until aim of delivery is excellently completed.It takes approximately 5 business working daysfor delivery from the day of pick-up because our shipping method is always compared toexpress shipping.
We will also like you to know that for you being the shipper you are the one supposed to make the payment to us.The only method of payment we accept is via Western Union Money Transfer or Money Gram to our financial manager in the delivery location.Let us know if you wish to proceed with this shipment so that we can email you back with all the information you require to be able to transfer the funds to us.We look forward to serving you to your fullest satisfaction.
Thank You
Mosher Tawiah
Shipping Department.
ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: The information contained in this e-mail message may be privileged and confidential information and is intended only for the use of the individual and/or entity identified in the address or this message. If the reader of this message is not the intended recipient, or an employee or agent responsible to deliver it to the intended recipient, you are requested not to print, distribute or copy this communication. If you have received this communication in error, please notify us immediately by telephone or return e-mail and delete the original message from your system.
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On 10-28-09, David Kelly wrote:
Hello Boom-Boom
How are you doing i hope all is well yes as i said i will order the rest later OK i need you number so that we can talk on phone....
David
On 10-28-09, Vladdio wrote to the shipper:
Mr. Robert Tawiah,
Speak now I you. In training for the sales. I am Bao Mouve Minht. Fine for Bao. Me. Mr.Cameron Asgaboom not now. When sick go sick. Him acount to me. No.1 trainnee for the pollcover to sell. Very many english to be learn. Say Bao send Swedish for cover. 2years englishschool. NO PROBLEM Tawiah. Mr.Cameron go no boom. boom-boom and Bao make sale talk and Bao number with fine. Yes fine. Deal money now $3,281.15 and to David for Swedish no go boom. Ship boaty with Mosher Tawiah and number $ $1,775.00. OK no duck.
Send now pickupClappy Hands. Bao $ to ROBERSONEASYWAY LTD (Dealers in Shipping,Importing & Exporting of Goods) and Western Union Money Transfer or Money Gram big money OK.
Byebye
Bao
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